Musings and opinions on a life filled with work, a husband, a toddler, a newborn and two crazy dogs.
Thursday, March 02, 2006
One last thing...
My biggest myspace dilemna is whether or not to try to get in contact with Adam. He is occassionally on instant messaging and recently he's created a myspace page. There is just this part of me that really wishes we could have been friends in the end. I totally take a large portion of the blame for being a psycho after he dumped me, but when you're 18 and think you're in love and there's no one else, you just can't help some of the crazy things you do. He was such a significant part of my life and there's still this aching need to make things right between us. He probably doesn't even care. What do you all think? Should I try to get in contact? We probably have nothing in common anymore. Is it worth it?
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8 comments:
This is a debate near and dear to my heart as I wonder and feel the exact same thing about Kenny. The older I get the more I realize he was right and I was wrong. I'd even be willing to admit it to him! Thing is - I dont' think he'd care at this point. I really do wish we could still be friends. hell, if my MOM can, why can't I?!
Sarah has instructed me to not do it when we had this debate. Helpful advice one day when I heard a song that reminded me of him and was ready to 411 him. Thing is - what do you say? "How have you been?" "What's new?". Such a weird thing...
I expect everyone has thier own Adam/Kenny...
if you figure out the "right" answer let me know...
I don't know if there truely is a right/wrong answer to this age old debate. We always wonder "what if" but then again, aren't we better off with what we now have? Yes, I too had this debate, but am very lucky to be where I am today. Otherwise, I'd be stuck in the past and not able to dream and live the future.
I don't have problems living my life or looking to my future. I love Kendall. I know he's the right man. But it's hard to walk away from such an important milestone in your life when you feel like you're leaving it in the wrong way.
For what it's worth...leave the past in the past. if it were fate and you ran into eachother accidentally in the store, that's one thing...personally I could go happily through my life and never see an ex. In fact, that's what I hope happens..er, doesn't..whatever. But that's my past. Que sera sera, whatever will be will be. But I wouldn't initialize it. Not a big "ex" anyways.
I say contact him... it's worth it. When you hear him talk about how his mind is open to much more now and he goes on about some philosophical thing, it may help you feel the closure you're looking for.... or it will (at the very least) give you a good laugh. :) I don't let friends go easily, but I did finally "say" goodbye to him. 8(
Some friends are in your life for a reason; some for a season; and a few, a very small few, are in your life for a lifetime.
Where does Adam fit? :)
I've gone back and forth on this one recently, and I think I've come to a new conclusion. If it's important enough to you that you're thinking about it frequently then you should contact him. Especially since you know it's not a question of wanting to be with him or "the one that got away". Like you said, you love Kendall, but it would be nice if you and Adam could be friends in the end. I say go for it.
I would leave it alone, but I'm not in your situation and don't understand the history. I feel like I'm better off leaving those parts of the past behind me - they didn't work out for a reason.
I'm going to echo all those who advised you to leave it alone. Anyone remember Drew from the Milwaukee German club?
Dated him in high school and it ended with me being really hurt. After UD we sort of found each other again, but it was a really bad situation - he gave the impression that he cared, but then would be an asshole again.
After I decided it wasn't worth it - the getting hurt and the frustration - other people kept telling me he was sorry and he really missed me, and that after he heard I was getting married he got really depressed.
Anyway, I know your situation is different, mostly because you've got Kendall and because you're a lot older, there's too much potential for more frustration and stress on your end.
Jumping off my soapbox...
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